Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Workout Journal Day #5: Jogging with a stroller is great exercise! And hard work for whoever is pushing me.
We`ve all been talking about your paranoia.
Every time i see a person kneeling over tying their shoe, i run up behind them and hop over them to try and get a game of leapfrog going.
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
I don’t understand why I cant lose weight. I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
Imagine all the amazing places you could take naps if you were Superman.
“Hey baby, do you smell that?” “No.” “Me neither, start cooking.”
Cats spend two thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.
Have you tried complaining about it for hours?
If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that`s another weakness
It usually only takes about five minutes into any conversation I’m having before people start shaking their head and quoting the bible.
If turning alcohol into bad decisions ever becomes an Olympic event, I`m bringin` home the Gold! USA! USA!
I`d save a lot more money on car insurance if they quit spending billions on advertising.
Do you think all the giraffes sit around and watch Margaret in Nebraska give birth?
Pink camouflage: I`m like, where you hiding? Candyland?