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That awkward moment when You accidentally hit the LIKE button During Facebook stalking.
I smile when I`m having dirty thoughts :)
Fish must be excellent drivers. Very rarely do you hear about fish getting into car accidents.
"Haha" - me when I don`t understand the reference
A lot of people are very competitive when playing stupid.
My dad taught me righty tighty, lefty loosie.... that`s why I never dated left handed chicks.
Quiet people have the loudest minds.
In a parallel alternate universe, my cat and my dog have jobs and I chill at home.
It`s almost Valentines Day and I still don`t know what to get myself yet.
Don’t ask me again” is my favorite computer button that I wish was also a real life button.
I hate it when I think I`m buying organic vegetables and I get home to discover they`re just regular doughnuts.
I`m not mental, other wise the rubber duckies would have told me by now...
Just completed my sexual harassment training and I think I`m finally ready to start harassing people.
It`s frustrating to know, I`ll never experience the exhilaration of getting to meet me.
It`s amazing how much us guys complain about women and then fully trust them with our pen!ses in their mouth.