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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Funny how things change with time, I used to hate spankings.. ;)
I swear my cat was an alarm clock in a previous life...
I may be crazy, but crazy is better than stupid.
If intelligent people don’t start having babies as fast as the trash in β€œhoney boo boo”, we’re headed for a very dumb future. Am I the only one that sees this?!
I always tell myself there is no such thing as a stupid question, but everyday someone tries to change my mind
I don`t know if getting everything I want would make me happy, but the opposite is not working at all.
"2 weeks with my baby xoxoxo" lol,calm down romeo&juliet.
Inspirational status of the day: Don`t be a douche.
Someday, somewhere, somehow I’m going to do something.
My mission is to be the first person on Facbook to have one million people on their block list. . .
A fun thing to do when leaving the Zoo, is too start frantically running and yelling "OMG they`ve all escaped!"
Velcro, what a rip-off!
Wait, carjacking doesn`t mean masturbating in my vehicle? Then no, I didn`t get arrested for carjacking.
Im convinced that one day we will all live in the future.
I`m on my 5th coffee, just in case you`re wondering about the "other way" to get to Narnia .