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It’s always awkward the first time you hold hands with someone because they usually want to know who you are and why you just grabbed them.
If you cry loudly enough at a Walmart everyone will just assume you work there.
I`m not shy. I`m just being quiet because I know that if I open my mouth to speak, a flow of never- ceasing, insulting comment directed at you will immediately spew from within me.
I prefer to be crazy and happy rather than normal and bitter......
is accepting applications. Needed someone to keep me from doing dumb stuff. See previous post.
I went to Jared for my girlfriend`s Christmas gift. I`m sure she will love her Subway gift card.
I don`t understand fat poor people. What are you eating? Broken hopes and dreams?
Haircuts are great because I did none of the work but get all of the credit.
I`m so good, I scream my own name out during sex.
Bored? Simply send a text message to a random number saying..."I`m Pregnant!"
The only honest people in the world are small children and me after a couple cocktails.
She lost me at, "I don`t watch football."
If everyone would just be naughty next year, Santa would bring us all coal ... energy crisis solved!
Take my advice; I don’t use it anyway.
I`m sure the guy standing at the urinal next to me, regrets wearing those flip flops today.