Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Almost time for my nightly foursome......... Me, my bed, my pillow and my blanket! What the hell were YOU thinkin` you perv!!!!!!
On the bright side, I`m relieved we live in a society where we acknowledge that the people who make sandwiches are artists.
"Don`t make me regret this." -things I think when accepting a friend request.
Facebook looks so boring on the outside, but once you start using it, its like NARNIA BRO!
Is there ever a day when mattresses are not on sale?
No PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on Facebook.
“Single and ready to mingle” is the fancy way of saying “Alone and desperate”
I am not judging you...I already decided I don`t like you
If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that sh!t means but at least they`re not talking to you anymore.
Help keep America beautiful. Stay in your house today.
just keep scrolling nothing to see hear
Has anybody seen my keys? they`re awesome.
It`s amazing what you can accomplish when you do stuff.
Hi I was calling about the $300/hour part time job I read about in a sexy ad I saw on an illegal torrent site. Are you guys still hiring?
I used to be so broke when homeless people saw me coming by they would hide their change cups.