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Surly not EVERYBODY was Kung-Foo fighting?
Do you think retailers in Colorado have seen an increase in the sales of Easy Bake ovens and Brownie mix?
I`m sorry I hurt your feelings. When I called you stupid, I really thought you already knew.
It might look like I`m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I`m quite busy.
Pinatas are a great way to teach children that if you repeatedly beat something with a stick, eventually you`ll get what you want.
I`m always on the verge of running three miles, or drinking a bottle of Vodka
I`m watching Godzilla tonight.... His parents asked me to babysit
"Never go to bed angry" is the worst advice ever. I haven`t slept in a week!
This morning someone threw Skittles at me and said "Taste the Rainbow", I ran them over with my car and sang,"Nationwide is on your side"
The most exercise I get from my exercise ball is when I move it around in my apartment so that it`s not in my way.
I wish I could pick which brain cells the alcohol kills....There`s ALOT of crap I wish I could forget about.....
am I the only one who would beat the sh!t out of someone for wearing a "forever lazy" to a tailgate?
The early bird needs a punch in the throat.
Why be part of the problem when you can be all of it?
One thing the porn industry has taught me is that this summer I defiantly need to get a job as a poolboy.