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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Who else`s favorite Spring time game is "Guess how deep that pothole really is."
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
I regret nothing but mostly because I can`t remember most of the stuff I should probably regret
Did you know that if you light a candle under the moonlight and you say 3 times the name of the person you love, you will look really stupid doing that!
Just finished my first book yesterday. 450 pages. Man, that was a lot of coloring...
The last time I touched a breast, it was in a KFC bucket.
If women are so perfect at multitasking, how come they can`t have a headache and sex at the same time?
When people tell me knock knock jokes, I pretend I`m not home.
I`m holding cheerleader tryouts for my fantasy football team
Life really is all down-hill once you get to big too ride in the shopping cart anymore isnt it??
I once had a goldfish that could break-dance on carpet, but only for like 20 seconds...
My resume is really just a list of things I never want to do again.
I ate the whole box of Slim Fast bars. So excited about how skinny I`ll be when I wake up tomorrow.
most teens are switching to twitter instead of facebook. noone wants to get on facebook and catch dad pocking mom... if you kno what I mean;)