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My driver`s side window stopped working,,,, So yeah,, I`m probably gonna starve to death..
Ever have the experience of staring at an outfit hanging in your closet and wondering which of the personalities did the shopping that day?
If I told you I loved you, would you believe me or just stand there freaking out about me being in your closet?
I just had a moment of clarity. Glad that`s over with.
The good thing about "poking" on Facebook, no babies are created.
If two cannibals fight, does that make it a food fight?
Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
If ignorance is bliss then there`s a crap load of people in paradise
How can there be more horses asses than there are horses?
I never mix business with pleasure, ......unless i call an escort.
Did you know? If you put your finger in your ear and scratch, it sounds like Packman!
There`s nothing like the laughter of a baby....unless you`re home alone at 1 am...and you don`t have children...
People always say, "You can`t have your cake and eat it too." I say, "Of course you can. Just make two cakes!"
So apparently I`ve been Googling `Asian Prom` this whole time. I watched like seven videos before I realized they weren`t going to bang.
I`m feeling 22.. Pounds overweight.