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What sort of drug abuse and debauchery has to occur in someone`s life for them to start liking Charmin Toilet Paper on Facebook?
Dumped my multiple personality girlfriend yesterday. She took it well, not so well, and she was really upset...
How to tell if a woman is mad at you: 1.She`s quiet 2.She`s yelling 3.She acts the same 4.She acts different 5.She murdered you
this website used to be full of funny statuses. Then the 8-year olds came in.
Why I stay slim? I once was forced to pay for two plane tickets, one for a person who wasn`t travelling with me. That`s why.
Its never polite to ask the guy at the next table "are you done with that?" Especially when he`s breaking up with his girlfriend.
People who don’t like pizza are people you don’t need in your life.
What is this `wrong hole` you people speak of?
The funny moment when a fat kid says "that`s how I roll".
I took a sexual harassment course this afternoon ....I think I`m gonna be pretty good at it.
it`s friday o clock
That mind-blowing moment when you realize chores were really the crap your parents didn’t want to do.
I hate when you tell someone you’re bored, and they suggest getting together. Then you have to explain that you’re not quite that bored.
I once dated a woman who thought windmills were solar powered. I`m so glad I don`t drink anymore.
All these years and I still don`t understand why they didn`t put Kevin Bacon in Grease.