Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m like the stink in your feet.....I will always be with you.
Deadliest Catch and Jersey Shore - two reality tv shows about catching crabs
I`m already getting into the Thanksgiving spirit, I`ve given the bird to lots of people today.
Has it ever occurred to optimists and pessimists that the glass is refillable?
Right before I die, I am going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels to make the cremation a bit more interesting.
I`m not saying we should kill all the incompetent people. I`m simply suggesting we remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo has been canceled. In other news, my faith in humanity has been restored.
That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent”.
life is short play naked
This guy at the gym just did four sets of selfies.
My mind is like "LETS DO THIS SH!T" but my body is like "calm down motherf*cker"
Whoever said "What goes around, comes around", never passed around a bag of Doritos......................
I have no time or patience for games in my relationships. Unless by “games” you’re referring to naked Twister. I can make time for that.
I just lost my mood ring, I don`t know how I feel about that.
Is it just me, or did anyone else wake up on the SEXY side of the bed this morning?