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I`ll never have a kid as cool as the one my parents did…
According to my neighbor’s journal, I have boundary issues.
I have OCD and ADD, so everything must be perfect..but not for very long.
Hmmmm, thats odd. . . .According to this height / weight chart. . . . I`m too short.
It’s amazing how much more money I have when I’m drunk.
I am addicted to Cold Turkey. Not sure how I will ever quit that one.
Unless your kid’s fundraiser is selling booze, I want no part of it.
I don`t get why people find drunk text annoying
I`m not sure how to say this but ... Worcestershire sauce
"I get knocked down, but I get up again, You`re never gonna keep me down" ~Bowling pins
My life has a surprising lack of dance battles.
That first kiss in the morning is so special, and the dog enjoys it too.
First Ebola case in USA , and the Walking Dead starts next week... brb gonna go buy a crossbow.
The weather is so nice. I think I’ll go outside and watch other people run.
24 astronauts were born in Ohio.....What is it about that state that makes people want to flee the Earth?