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Perhaps Nicki Minaj just lost a series of bets.
The best part about being at work on Friday is that it gives me 9 hours to figure out what I`m going to drink tonight.
Men use love to get sex...women use sex to get love...I use coupons to get pizza!
Oh, I thought you were talking about napping. In that case no, I`m not good in bed.
My neighbor thinks I`m crazy and that I`ve been stalking her. well at least that`s what her diary says.
I walked into the bar sober with $42 & walked out drunk with $42. But you`re right fellas, men are smarter than women.
It`s amazing how we are very good lawyers for our own mistakes and very good Judges for other people`s mistakes.
I used to have superpowers but the psychiatrist took them away.
Did you know that running for just 10 minutes a day raises your risk of posting inspirational quotes by 63%?
So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere.
Was late to my first Fight Club last night so missed the intro rules. Still, Fight Club was brilliant and I`d highly recommend Fight Club.
You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine
I will give you unconditional love as soon as you meet my list of demands.
I just went into an AOL chat room to ask someone how to start a fire with sticks.
Isn’t it funny how people that talk too much also have annoying voices?