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People assume I’m smart when they see my glasses case. Then they see that I use it to store a Snickers bar and they recognize my true genius.
Someone asked me how much love was worth and I couldn’t answer because alimony is calculated differently in each state.
I hate it when I put a status and you don`t like it,example this one.
Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor?
On the Internet you can be anything you want ... It`s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.
I`m as bored as a guy with no arms looking at porn.
Here`s a joke for all you mind readers...
Marriage. The world`s oldest form of identity theft.
How can I be expected to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count?
Yes, my attitude could stand some improvement but my insurance does not cover those meds.
A new day : the possibilities, endless. the funds, insufficient.
People says nothing is imposible.. But i do nothing everyday!!
I wish that life had an option for viewing other available episodes.
I said my wife`s name three times in front of the bathroom mirror and now my wallet`s empty...
So today my gym was crowded...at least I think it was a gym...Do gyms usually have drive thrus?