Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Occasionally, I like to agree with a man just to watch the look of fear, confusion and nervous-anxiety.
You seem to love cocktails... or part of it.
True laziness is being excited when plans get canceled.
Edward Scissorhands will never win a game of rock, paper, scissors.
I love slip on shoes because you can slip them off just as easy to hit stupid people with them.
I decided I`m going to be poor... Its Cheaper :)
Can we just stop with the pre-sliced cheese? Is anyone so busy that they don’t have time to cut the cheese?
Hate having friends? Just chew with your mouth open.
I love arguing with you so much, I`ll bring a Ouija board to your funeral.
its not the up`s and down`s that bring you down...its the jerks!!
Facebook should have a limit on times you can change your relationship status... After 3 it should default to "Unstable"
I think I`m going to run for political office, so people can dig up dirt on me. I have been wanting to piece together my twenties.
5 symptoms of laziness –> 1.
Being in the friend zone is like being the guy in the band who plays that little triangle.
How much tequila goes into mashed potatoes again?