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No matter how busy a guy is, he can always take out a moment from his busy life to just stop and stare at a beautiful girl.
Sometimes, I like to stalk random strangers vacation pic`s, and tag myself as one of the people in the background just for laughs.
Sorry to all my friends and family members who didn`t know I was a freak until they saw my likes and shares on Facebook.
Who let the owls out?? Don`t sing the chorus you`ll make it worse.
Sometimes I post crazy shit just to see if my friend`s list will drop a few #`s
Lesson Learned: I poured bleach on the asshole that cut me off at the self-checkout. According to the cop, I misunderstood asshole bleaching.
When life hands you lemons it should only remind you to buy more tequila, life is as simple as that.
I did a push-up today. Well, actually I fell down, but had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. Now I need a beer.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
I repaired my blow up doll with superglue.....that was an awkward trip to the emergency room (<>..<>)
They say do what you love & the money will follow. I love doing nothing. We`ll see.
FYI: I`m never gonna tell the person I`m meeting up with that you said hi.
Redneck`s famous last words: "Is that enough duck tape?"
thinks that 100-calorie packs have just enough cookies to piss me off!!
You`re annoying, but honestly, I`ve been annoyed by better.