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"Give me your finest meal, money is of no concern." ~ Me at McDonald`s on pay day.
You Are The Reason My Middle Finger Was Created.
The brain is like the most outstanding organ. It works for 24 hours, 365 days, right from your birth until you fall in love.
You don`t have to like me, I`m not a Facebook status.
superbowl: the only time I actually look forward to watching commericals.
Sorry, I didn’t get your message because I deleted it without listening.
Futons are the most disappointing Transformers ever.
It might look like I`m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I`m quite busy.
I go into Best Buy and ask "Where are your most expensive yet least guarded items?" Then someone is always nearby when I have questions.
Google must be a woman...it knows everything.
Fitness? More like fitness whole cheesecake in my mouth.
Have you ever wondered about the look on someone`s face if you hide under their bed and grab their foot in the middle of the night? Just something to think about.....goodnight!
You know it`s been a good night when you wake up and see bite marks on the walls...
If I was on drugs, this post would be amazing.
Marriage teaches you forgiveness, compromise and tons of other things you wouldn`t need if you`d stayed single.