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Finally got my Bon Jovi Sat Nav working... Wooahh we`re half way there.
Sometimes I worry that eating pizza isn`t a real sport.
I`ve come to terms with the fact that I will never experience leftover pizza.
I sometimes worries about my short attention span, ...but not for very L... hey! ... look at that squirrel!
Saw someone try and park a car for about 10 minutes. I didn’t see the person so I’m not going to assume what gender she was.
Lord, it`s me... Can you close your eyes for a couple minutes while I deal with a slight problem?
Surgery is just stabbing someone to life.
Help keep America beautiful. Stay in your house today.
Clapping: Repeatedly high-fiving yourself for someone else`s accomplishments.
I got so drunk last night I tried picking up every woman in the bar and now my back is killing me!
One day id like to have a brand new Iphone like the lady in front of me with the food stamps.
Neil Armstrong said "One small step for man...". I would`ve just said "OH MY GOD, I`M ON THE MOON!!!!!!".
If you`re confident enough, every zoo is a petting zoo.
Do you ever get the feeling that you`re being watched? Because if it`s bothering you, I`ll stop.
Wonder what my couch is doing right now.