Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It`s not a real relationship until their zip code is in your Weather Channel app.
Don`t you just hate it when people say stuff in thier status that you really didn`t want to know? I hate that. Anyway, I gotta go poop. Talk to ya later.
My kids don`t even know they have a grandma that gives them $100 on their birthdays
You really understand how drunk you are when you`re peeing...
I`m doing the KFC Bucket Challenge!
Sometimes I write "This is a hold up. I have a gun." in the memo of the checks I write for people and pray they cash them at the teller.
Who decided to call the man purse a satchel and not a douchebag?
If Violets were Orange, poetry would be a lot more challenging.
Help keep America beautiful. Stay in your house today.
99% of people in this world are stupid, luckily I`m in the other 2%
Please help control the pet population, have that special talk with your pet!
Im really not just some idiot with nothing better to do with my time, I just play one in FB.
Someone stole my identity and returned it 10 minutes later.
Sometimes I send status updates from my phone so it looks like I left the house.
Microsoft Excel has got to be the worlds worst video game.