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The story of George Washington chopping down the cherry tree is my favorite tale of honesty, integrity, and giving a child an ax
Did you ever notice that the doctor’s bill is always a lot more readable than the doctor’s prescription?
Who the hell is Pete, and why do we do things for his sake?
For a minute there, I thought I had just wasted 60 seconds...
Yesterday I had to screw in a light bulb . Later, I crossed a road and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.
I use to be addicted to soap, but now I`m clean
I don’t really forgive people I just pretend like it`s okay and wait for my opportunity to destroy them.
Running away does not help with the problems unless you are fat
Moving all my retirement funds into a Colorado snack machine franchise.
I hear boomerangs are making a comeback.
All i wanna know is how this website knew my name is Guest?
Who am I calling stupid?? Good question.... What`s your name?!
Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhhhh its a secret.
I think I’m going to take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it…
Anyone going to stare at their phones anywhere cool this weekend?