Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I don`t need glasses ... I drink straight from the bottle.
The home cooked pizza box says to cook the pizza between 14 and 16 minutes. That`s 15 minutes, right? I`m not reading too much into it?
For once I`d like to see "It`s been a crappy year, mainly cause your were part of it"
If I had a dollar for every time someone has told me to grow up, I could probably afford a whole arsenal of Super Soakers.
People say there are plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but I’m human, I don’t date fish.
Thesaurus for sale, brand new, current, modern, original, unused, untapped, fresh, pristine, untouched, mint condition, spotless, untried...
A graham cracker is just a white dude selling coke in the ghetto.
was going to argue with you...but then I remembered I really didn`t care
It`s all shits and giggles till someone giggles and shits
Home: The place where I can look ugly and enjoy it.
I like my coffee like I like my men: caffeinated, made of beans, muscular, tousled hair, you know what, I don`t really know how to do this..
I start every morning with a simple affirmation: I will not murder anyone today.
Trouble is just fun you got caught having.
My facebook has been rated PG for Poor Guy
You call it reckless driving, I call it searching for my lighter.