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I`m never wrong. One time, I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken.
I`m gonna open a bar and name it Rehab.....
Some of my ideas are about as profitable as selling YOLO T-Shirts at a Reincarnation seminar
Why are kids obese? Maybe because Burgers are $.99, & Salads are $4.99.
I just scrolled so far back on Facebook`s Timeline... I wound up back over on MySpace. :(
I love you more each day as my other options diminish.
I really need to clean the house, but I`m thinking it`d be a lot faster to burn it down and start from scratch...
A procrastinator`s work is never done...
I don’t know what my neighbor’s name is and we’ve been neighbors too long for me to ask.
If you have alphabet fridge magnets and morals, you probably shouldn`t invite me over.
I`d like to read an obituary that says "He laid down the boogie and played that funky music till he died."
If I ever win the lottery and someone asks me for money I`m going to give them a dollar and say "Here. Go play the Lottery. That`s what I did."
Instead of laughing my a$$ off, I`m going to start laughing my stomach off. I`d rather lose that.
Why eat a carrot when you can just as easily not eat a carrot?
just spilled alphabet soup on my keyboard. I`m so confused