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Ziploc`s idea of how big a sandwich should be is very different than mine.
One thing`s for sure when I shower with my boyfriend. My titties are spotless!!
The best thing about telepathy is…I know, right?
It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
Babe, you look Hot! Is your air conditioner broken?
The easiest way to keep a secret is without help
When we give each other a thumbs up, it`s our way of mocking every other animal on earth.
They say you are what you eat but what happens if you didn`t mean to eat it. I don`t want to be a bug.
A poem about me: I hate mornings. I wish I was drunk. The End.
Couples Halloween costumes always end up looking like one person went along with it to save the relationship.
I successfully cleared a path from the front door to the TV. Now I can watch Hoarders.
If you`re in WalMart and you`re holding in a fart, just remember, YOU`RE IN WALMART!!
I turned out ok for a kid raised in a large part by Bugs Bunny.
Relationships are not a test... So why cheat?
Im really not just some idiot with nothing better to do with my time, I just play one in FB.