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So you`ll be able to buy Girl Scout Cookies online this year ... Your move Weight Watchers
Everyone has fitness goals and I’m over here like, if I burn this many calories I can eat a whole pizza.
You are intriguing. You require further stalking, sorry I mean investigation.
Once again I`ve woken up without super powers. Sigh
I like playing with my dog when I`m high. Because I don`t have one when I`m sober.
Every shape I had to learn above octagon was just a total fu*king waste of time.
"Bros before hoes" is something a bro without a hoe would say.
I copied and pasted your pic of what you ate...and got MORE "likes" than you did. :P
That amazing moment when you post a comment on Facebook and everyone likes it.
There’s gotta be a better use for the part of my brain that remembers every word to “Baby Got Back.”
If I was a Chinese millionaire I would change my name to Cha Ching.
My idea of drinking responsibly is using a coaster.
Occasionally, I like to take a look through my old status updates and smile at my sparkling wit.
All I’m saying is, you’ve never seen me crying and eating tacos at the same time.
After reading some marriage post, I`m beginning to suspect we all may have been married to the same person.