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"F@ck It" has gotten me through a lot of situations.
Bad Morning: As I sit on the throne remembering I used all the toilet paper last night for Halloween pranks.
So how long before GoFundMe is our nation`s leading health care provider?
The part of "no" that I donΒ΄t understand is the part where I donΒ΄t get what I want
Your french fries are just my french fries on the wrong plate.
There is no such thing as a dirty mind. Just a sense of humor with adult content.
Really discouraging that there`s still bald people in sci fi movies.
"Rise and shine” is probably the most depressing thing a shoeshiner hears in the morning.
wassup pips! :-) no i don`t mean you guys pip, get it? piping?? haaahaaa... looks like i`m the only one laughing right? well it sounded funnier in my head (-_-)
The more I get to know you, the more I`m convinced that you are the sole inspiration behind many medications.
The majority of Americans support sending Congress to Syria.
You can either be right, or you can be the husband.
I could really go for a vegetable sandwich! Maybe some tomatoes, some spinach, cucumbers... With cheese. And a hamburger patty. And bacon. Ok I really want a bacon cheeseburger.
To whoever said β€œfight fire with fire”: do you actually test your own advice before giving it?
I love food, napping on the couch, and getting super excited about car rides, I`m basically a golden retriever.