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Feeling bored? Go to a clothing store and put "one size fits all" stickers on the bras.
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck.
I think the spork would have caught on better if they called it "a forkin` spoon!"
I hate it when I mentally undress a woman and my OCD kicks in and I start folding her clothes.
Now that Microsoft`s Steve Ballmer has bought the Clippers, I wonder if he will release a new version every few years that we all hate.
Life is never more confusing than when three people get together to order one pizza.
If there are ice cream trucks in the summer, why aren`t there hot chocolate trucks in the winter?
I live for two reasons. 1) I was born. 2) I haven`t died yet.
Working from home and HR already cited me for sexual misconduct.
The hour that we lose this weekend is the one that I was planning on going to the gym.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody is there to appreciate it.
Well, just 8 more hours of Facebook and I can go back to bed. *phew*
"Nothing there? Better bark at it." - my dog
You mean to tell me people run? On purpose? When nobody is chasing them?
The wife has been missing a week now, police said to prepare for the worst, so I have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back.