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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m at the "what can I make with green beans and cake mix" stage of needing groceries
There is always something to be thankful for. If you can’t pay your bills, you can be thankful you are not one of your creditors.
My tricks aren`t for kids.
I’m tired of things costing money.
I`d rather have my arms fall off than make two trips carrying in groceries.
50 notifications later I regret ever commenting on your status.
I left my phone at home all day today. Is the sky always blue like that?
My moral in life is simple. You treat me good and I`ll treat you better.
Roasting marshmallows is great because it combines dessert and playing with fire.
Everyone’s an optimist when it comes to their car’s fuel gauge.
I know some of you would find it hard to believe, but I don`t say everything that pops into my head. I don`t think the average person could handle it.
A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.
Note to future self: Tequila is a liar. You do not sound exactly like Axl Rose & the people at karaoke will not catch you if you stage dive
69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.
Don’t compare yourself to others, that’s when you start to lose confidence in yourself.