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I put the pro in inappropriate.
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
The batteries in my electric toothbrush died before I finished. I`ve never sympathized more with women in my life.
My personal fast food philosophy: If nobody knows you went to McDonald`s, you didn`t really go to McDonalds.
The speed in which a woman says “nothing” when asked “what’s wrong” is inversely proportional to the severity of the sh!tstorm that’s coming.
I like my relationships like I like my eggs: over easy.
Every time I see a preview for Hoarders, I grab the closest thing to me and immediately throw it away.
Despite the high cost of living, it still remains popular.
Why would I dance like nobody`s watching? People need to see this.
If you`re ever lost in the woods and have a compass, the compass can help you be lost more north.
2013 is the first year since 1987 to have 4 different numbers… carry on.
Asking me if I’m hungry, is like asking me if I like money.
every woman iz beautuful n her unique way, smtimz it needs sm amount of alcohol to see with
If I had a penny for everytime I heard you bitch at me I`d have enough money to invest in a hitman
I went frisbee golfing today. I didn`t get an ace, but I did hit a guy and that was just as satisfying.