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Oh and BTW,,, Why haven`t Pig Pen`s parents been visited by child services yet?
Sometimes I think of something so wrong and inappropriate that my little black heart skips a beat with delight.
Take your age. Subtract 3. Then add 3. That is your age.
This nude beach would be great!...if I wasn`t the only one participating.
When you screw up, menopause can be a wonderful excuse for stupid things you do or say!!!
So those numbers on sports jerseys are how many people each player has killed or what.
I can`t wait to get home and have make-up sex! ... I`ve been arguing all day with myself.
If I hit snooze 3 times it should automatically send an email to my boss saying I`ll be out sick.
If there`s no god then how do you explain yoga pants?
8 more days and I will finally get rid of last years Halloween candy.
If you want to see exactly how angry a person can get, tell them to "calm down" when they`re already pissed off.
Today I saw a sign for a suicide helpline on the back of a bus. Wouldn`t it be a lot more helpful if it was on the front?
I`ll take an ice cream sandwich please. You know what? I`m trying to be healthy, can you change that to an ice cream salad instead? Thanks
And then God said, "Seems unfair to have given man an extra limb so to balance it out I`ll give women the power over which to control it."
If you ring my door bell you better be the pizza guy or a sexy naked lady ... with a pizza.