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Giving my wife a bikini wax for the first time. Should I wake her up or just let it be a surprise?
Women can walk around all day long in a bikini, but God forbid if you see them in their bras and panties. I will never comprehend this.
This town has more white trash in it than a dumpster behind a paper plate factory
When I arrive at work, how long can I spend screaming in my car before it becomes weird?
I stamp my hand on Saturday morning so it looks like I went out on Friday night.
The only thing worse than "the one that got away" is the one that won`t go away.
Iām amazing in bed. I have the ability to stay there all day.
God created the world in 7 days but took 9 months to create me. So clearly Iām a big deal...
Just a word of advice for all you single guys having a hard time out there, Forget the clubs, forget the churches, forget the online dating sites, as the best places to meet single women are the freezer section and down the cat food isle.....
A part of me wants to go on a diet and eat healthy. Sadly that part of me is a liar.
Neil Armstrong said "One small step for man...". I would`ve just said "OH MY GOD, I`M ON THE MOON!!!!!!".
I went to see the doctor today for my annual check-up. The good news is the he says I`m healthy as a horse. The bad news is he uses large farm animals to
I hate it when I open my fridge and get punched by a bear... =/
When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered is god playing angry birds hmm
If a dwarf smokes weed does he get high or medium?