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Hendrix didn`t need to twerk on stage. He performed the old fashioned way, relying only on his musical talents and near lethal doses of LSD.
I wish I had a friend like me
I always carry a lighter in case I end up at an impromptu concert...or need to set someone`s house on fire. Either way, I`m prepared.
I’m just going to put an “Out of Order” sticker on my forehead and call it a day.
The easiest way to keep a secret is without help
A good man can make you feel sexy, strong, and able to take on the world ...Oh sorry ...That`s wine ...Wine does that.
No Girlfriend November was a success, now for Don`t Date December, Just Me January, Forever Alone February, No Match March..... I got this.
"Ramen". - Scooby Doo, finishing a prayer
Just read a book on quantum evolution. The idea is that quantum mechanics are involved in the process of evolution. I still say go to WalMart and then try to sell me on evolution....
If I share my food with you, it’s either because I love you a lot, or because it fell on the floor and I don’t want it.
been there, done that, wrote the book and have the t-shirt to prove it. What more do you want!
The trick is not let anyone know how really weird you are until it’s too late to back out.
I`m in no shape to exercise patience!
I`d explain it to you again but I`m fresh out of crayons and puppets
There is nothing like sitting naked in a beanbag chair eating Cheetos. I hope they let me back in Walmart.