Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Thinking about moving to Alabama just so I don’t have to scroll through all those other states when I sign up for websites.
Before criticizing my taste, remember that I like you.
A recent survey of one person revealed that 100% of me thinks I should skip work tomorrow.
My mom just walked in and called me gay... If my nails weren`t drying i swear to God..
Don`t pick on Aquaman! The crime rate underwater is pretty damn low the last time I checked.
Some people just bring out the psycho in me
Someday, the time I waste deciding what to watch on Netflix will be shorter than the actual time watching it
Anything you say will be used against you, in an argument, 10 months from now, because I’m a woman. And we never forget. Anything. Ever.
I live like I type, fast and with lots of mistakes!
I`d engage you in a battle of wits, but I`m afraid you`re unarmed.
Actually told a girl who`s moving to France soon that "there`s lots of French people over there". It`s a wonder how I can even bathe myself.
Send me one more game request and I`m showing up at your house drunk, at 4am, naked and demanding a game of Twister
One man`s LOL is another man`s WTF
I went around the block with my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.
People who weigh their produce. What`s it like to have all the time in the world?