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I bet the "YMCA" dance is a lot harder to do in different languages
Another day where I`m not skinny, rich or famous. Getting real tired of this sh*t.
I`m hearing voices again. Probably because my window is open and there are people outside talking, but still.
What if all this time it`s been Chicken that taste like Frog legs????
You know you had a good night when you have to Google map yourself in the morning to find out where the hell you are.
If only I did everything with the same precision in which I craft my sandwiches.
I was at the pool today and tried to sneak a quick pee in the deep end. The lifeguard must have seen me. He blew his whistle so loud that I almost fell in.
Either my cat is speaking English or that was not a vitamin I took....
Happy Monday!! I`m gonna sit this one out.
I want the job of placing pepperoni slices on frozen pizzas, because clearly whoever has it is now has problems.
Lazy Rule: If you spill water, It will eventually dry.
Rabbits jump & they live for 8 yrs. Dogs run & they live for 15 yrs. Turtles don`t do anything & they live for 150 years. LESSON LEARNED!
Pink camouflage: I`m like, where you hiding? Candyland?
Happy birthday you motor boatin SOB! Have a great day
I hope daylight savings time doesnt throw me off my schedule of doing nothing.