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One of the most important things in life is perserverance. Hang on...perseveren...no, perserveer...pesever… oh, never mind.....
I always hate when I miss out on wear your pajamas to Wal-Mart night.
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching. -Bfanch
Iron Man is a superhero. Iron woman is a command.
Instead of the John, I call my bathroom the Jim...that way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim every morning.
I’m the king of balancing more trash on top of an already full trash can.
I hate when I wake up in the middle of the night to get a quick drink of water and then accidentally eat a whole pizza and a cheesecake
I puked in the backseat of my friend`s brand new Mustang in the Fall of 1989. There wasn`t any social networking back then, so I`m telling you all now...
I`m no expert, but I`m pretty sure a lot of economic problems could be solved by extending the McDonald`s breakfast menu back out to 11am.
You know nothing about a woman until she`s drunk and mad at you
If you put Root Beer in a square glass do you get Beer?
Falling out of bed the fun way. Oh wait, there isn`t a fun way....
Just looked at the price of baby strollers. I think were gonna have an indoor baby.
Women say all men are dogs, but fail to realize that dogs are the most loyal creatures in the world if you treat them right.
I`ve got worms !!!! ......... worms in me garden