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What flavor is this Harlem Shake you speak of?
At my age I can no longer function without my glasses. Especially when they`re empty.
Some of you are so dumb, I don`t even know how you found the internet.
I hate it when 18 wheelers blow their horns while Im driving, that sh*t wakes me up!
Just about the time I started to give a crap, my attitude became constipated......
We`re sorry to announce that due to budget cuts the beloved carol "Silver Bells" will be replaced with the more cost effective carol "Aluminium Bells".
I really don`t need to be loved.. I would settle for being tolerated. :)
Don`t put off until tomorrow what you can avoid the rest of your life.
Some days your the duck. Some days your the goose.
tried being normal. Didn`t like the feeling, so I`m going back to being ME.
You`ve got to love yourself ... Just not in public places
Your cat doesn`t love you. If it were bigger it would eat you.
That awkward moment when the woman your dancing behind bends over so you can grind it, and you realize she`s just lost an earring and nobody in Starbucks can hear your iPod...
I really like this new reality show "Neighbor Without Drapes"
It`s time to admit that as a species, we are just not ready for 4-way stops