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"I like tube tops too, but even tires have pressure limits!
If you raise your children, you spoil your grandkids. If you spoil your children, you raise your grandkids.
You can`t choose your family but you can choose a hitman.
I wonder if any Disney managers ever start a meeting off with "What kind of Mickey Mouse operation are we running around here?"
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, you have tits. Simple as that
I bet someone could get really rich opening a business that untangles Christmas lights!
If I owned a pet store Id put a different rat in the turtle cage every night just to see if any of the turtles knew karate the next morning.
okay it was me..... I did it ..... I let the dogs out
If lemons hand you life, you’re probably dyslexic
I swear my toddler yells at me in Vietnamese
This is not meant for you. Look away. STOP LOOKING AT IT! :)
Leave the past behind. Smile every day. Never wear underwear. I don`t know. Inspirational post are hard.
Beware of the deodorants with instructions that ask you to "remove the top and push up bottom"... they could at least make them round.
Ask not what your father can do for you, but what you can do for your father. Happy Fathers Day!
My local news station says it gives us " news when it breaks " ...I want unbroken news!!