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Forget the hero part, I just like the fact that Batman punches clowns.
Thinking of getting another kitchen table just for all my mail
I`ve been having really bad headaches lately. The doctor said they were all in my head.
Stop complaining about being single on Valentine`s Day. We have bigger problems in this world. Like why McDonald`s doesn`t serve breakfast after 10.30
I`ll decide whether it`s a compliment or sexual harassment.
Remember to make some bad decisions today. 20 years from now that’s all you’ll have to make your kids think you’re cool.
"I`m glad the weekends over" -Nobody ever
I found the "one" today! Surprisingly, It`s been on my keyboard all the time.
Stalin should have known communism doesn`t work. There were red flags everywhere.
I know the voices ain`t really, but man, do they ever come up with some great ideas.
According to my nipples, there is a 99% chance it`s cold as hell right now!
Have you ever wondered about the look on someone`s face if you hide under their bed and grab their foot in the middle of the night? Just something to think about.....goodnight!
Jail is just the government`s way of sending you to your room.
I wonder how the Never-ending story is doing.
You`re more inbred than sandwhich filler.