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The term "I paid GOOD money for that!" is soo silly..Honestly, have you ever seen BAD money? NOT ME !!!
There`s no easy way to steal a watermelon.
The only thing that makes me happy about the launch of a new model cell phone is that I can finally afford the previous model.
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people to send me a dollar.
Tired of those Political Ads on television?...... You may be entitled to compensation.
If you have a mirror handy, kindly gaze into it and you will find your problem
Always believe a woman when she says: “You don`t want to know!”
It doesn`t matter if you don`t like my personality... I have several more!
boss: why are you peeing on the floor? mikeski: i already filled up your coffee cup.
It´s not that I hate you, it´s just.. well I´ll put it this way.. if you were on fire & I had water, I´d drink it.
I`m so lonely I drive around town with a coffee cup glued to the roof of my car just so people will wave at me.
If someone threw a rock and knocked me off my donkey, would I be stoned off my a$$?
I`m going to invent a cleaning product that kills .1% of all germs and bacteria. It doesn`t sound very effective, but I`m going to get it placed right next to all the other cleaning products that kill 99.9% of all germs and bacteria.
Marrying your high school sweetheart is like taking the banker`s first offer on Deal or No Deal.
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.