Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Apparently when you donate blood, it has to be "YOUR" blood.
Things were said. Feelings were hurt. Your car was set on fire. My point is you’re wrong & Raphael isn’t the best Ninja Turtle. Get over it.
I love everyone these days... Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others, I`d love to punch in the face...
My wife and I decided not to have children. The kids are taking it pretty hard.
Whenever I see people lined up outside a club on Friday night, I just think β€œlook at all these poor people who don’t know Netflix exists.”
I`m starting to get that "f*ck it" attitude about everything..
My stalker twisted his ankle, so now I have to walk slower for 2-3 weeks.
Dudes get one chest or arm tattoo and suddenly forget to wear shirts.
They say a dog park is a great place to pick up girls. I don`t have a dog so I am walking around with a bag of poop so I won`t look weird.
Do you think the inventor of the USB will be buried twice? The 2nd time because they put him in the wrong way?
Those beards make the Red Sox look like they`re going to a Civil War reenactment as Confederates.
I don’t just act crazy, I’ll drive you there too.
I’ve found that I can usually judge how hot a woman is by how many times my girlfriend calls her a whore.
Why can`t we just change the spelling to fit the way it sounds: Bologna = Bolony Lasagna = lasania knife= nife tsunami = sunami politician = a$$hole