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Do whatever you want. And if it’s something you’re going to regret in the morning…sleep late.
I have decided I no longer want to be an adult. So if anyone needs me, I`ll be in my blankey fort... coloring.
Pretend it`s a beer... Pretend it`s a beer... Pretend it`s a beer... - Me trying not to drop a baby.
my Dr. says i have ADHD, i dont know how they see.... oooooh a squirrel!
This prefessor`s nuts. He keeps saying pie is square. I know better, pies are round, cakes are square!
Boys will be boys... unless they get a sex change.
Don’t ask me again” is my favorite computer button that I wish was also a real life button.
"Safely remove USB." Who does that?
I was standing in front of the mirror earlier, admiring my six pack for hours. But it got really warm so I put it back in the fridge.
Still waiting on the "Once you go black, you`ll never go back" episode of Mythbusters.
Why would a married man buy a hearing aid?
Someone stole my identity and returned it 10 minutes later.
Im still waiting for Anheuser-Bush to name a beer "responsibly" so i can drink it!
if sexyness, kindness, sweetness was a crime, You would be the world`s most wanted
Mosquito`s and parking inspectors must be from the same family...