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Taco Bell is donating burritos to feed firefighters in Colorado. Talk about putting gas on the fire,
Let`s talk about how fabulous u think I am.
I read "Do not believe everything you read." Now I`m not sure whether to believe this or not.
My spouse thinks I`m crazy. But I`m not the one who married me.
the jeremy kyle show, the only place you`ll see a six month old baby with more teeth than thier parents
It is hard to imagine how people showed their anger before doors were invented.
Am I the only one that always puts my wallet back into my pocket before getting my change back?
I don’t write children’s books because the last page would always say: "Now shut up and go to sleep."
My apartment is so dirty that I actually lost my last girlfriend to the 5 second rule.
God made men. But sandwiches weren`t going to make themselves. So God made women.
Sir, your burrito is $5.97. With guacamole, your total comes to $386,932.32
Dear future husband, here’s a few things you need to know If you want to be my one and only all my life. I will not be an ex wife .. only a widow
I don`t understand why people pay therapists when I`ll tell them what`s wrong with them for free.
Bartenders are basically professionals that we hire to poison us very slowly in creative ways.
"Have you ever wondered if the $1 bills in your wallet were ever in a stripper butt? - You`re wondering now!!!"