Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sex without love is merely healthy exercise.
The irony of social media is that the majority of users are all alone.
If we agree, I`m probably being sarcastic ... Or I`m drunk
I should start carrying a pool noodle in my car and randomly smack cars when stuck in traffic
"Sleeping on the couch" should be a relationship status on Facebook.
It’s actually the voices outside my head that bothers me the most
Now working on my 2nd million. I gave up on the first.
The brain is the most outstanding organ, it works for 24 hours 365 days, right from your birth until you fall in love.
"I knew that..." -Me, after every Jeopardy question.
I bet if there were little basketball hoops above every garbage can, littering would greatly decrease.
If all the world´s a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*
I’ve thought about it, and there still is no good reason for me to grow up.
We should be nicer to old people. When they walked uphill both ways in the snow they had to do it without an internet connection too.
Today’s forecast.. mostly cloudy with a 99.9% chance of alcohol