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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

My driver`s side window stopped working,,,, So yeah,, I`m probably gonna starve to death..
"You`ve got a friend in me." - Cannibals, probably
There’s a wild side to EVERY innocent face.
I feel bad for kids nowadays who can`t get the toys they want because their parents have to be 18 or older to call.
Fighting is bad. Breaking up a fight between a douchebag and the bar owner is good. Thank God I`m a ninja.
I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.
I talked to my mom, and she said she probably hadn`t had sex with any of you guys. Damn dirty liars.
Is life fair? Short answer, no. Long answer, nooooooo.
Was disappointed when I watched the films Shaft, XXX, X-Men, In To Deep, Snatch, The Box, Free Willy. None of them were what I expected...
cofeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffee... Wheeeeeeeeee!
My kids are giving all the people on this airplane a hard lesson in birth control right now.
The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they`re going to be when you kill them.
I say if you can`t come up with anything nice to say then post it on Facebook.
Hell hath no fury like a girl tagged in an unapproved pic on Facebook.
"That girl is totally checking you out" said vodka. -Bfanch