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PLEASE - put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and, in case you didn`t know, they can also breathe fire. 93% of people won`t copy and paste this, because they have already been eaten by dragons. 6% of people are sitting in the shower armed with fire extinguishers and the remaining 1% are awesome and will re-post.
It’s embarrassing that 90% of my Google history is just words I wasn’t sure how to spell, and yes I googled embarrassing.
I like it like that
they say "money cant buy happiness" but money pays for my internet connection and my vodka so im thinking maybe "they" are wrong
My New Year`s resolution was to lose 15 lbs by the middle of February. I have 20 lbs. to go.
I don`t have ADD. It`s just that everything is more interesting than what I have to get done.
Hang out with different people everyday so the only person who knows you`ve been wearing the same outfit all week is you.
You should get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep... 9 if you`re an ugly bitch...
Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit.
Sunday morning = lazy lay in my bed and fart under my sheets all day :)
I don`t care how old I am, if I go out to eat and there are crayons and paper place mats with puzzles...GAME ON!!
If anyone tells you, you have ADHD. Pay no attention.
Women are like bacon, they smell great, taste delicious and kill you slowly. Men are like bacon because we`re pigs.
What`s the opposite of wanting to hear about you doing crossfit? I`m that.
If you would`ve told me back in 1999 that we`d still be using animated gifs in 2015, I would`ve said "Wow, what a boring conversation"