Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Kids may be a gift, but I like playing with the box it came in.
I had to leave the bowling alley right in the middle of the game. I didn`t have time to spare.
I don`t exactly have a "to do" list. I have what you might call "If I ever log off Facebook and feel like getting around to doing it" list.
When in doubt, take a nap.
I don`t have ADD. It`s just that everything is more interesting than what I have to get done.
It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. Then I`m back. Me, explaining a vacation to my cat.
My neighbours diary say`s I have boundary issues.
A person soon learns how little they know when a child begins to ask questions.
"I`m not drunk" - Biggest Friday Night Lie.
I enjoy a bit of unnecessary swearing as much as the next f*cker.
I don`t know what I would do without Facebook, but I`m sure it would be something more productive
Back in my day we rode our bikes without helmets and we turned out fine. And you know what else? Back in my day we rode our bikes without helmets and we turned out fine.
Never underestimate the power of cleavage.
I hate it when I meow at cats and they don`t meow back. Unbelievably rude
I automatically assume you`re fat if your Facebook picture is a car