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Carrots are a great thing to eat when you are hungry and want to stay that way.
Don`t blame me. You`re the one following a 41 year old man who just jumped into his bed like an Olympic athlete because scary monsters.
I put ALL my eggs in one basket at the grocery store.... Today..!!
My mind is exceptionally quiet.... I am suspicious that I am up to something I don`t want myself to know about.
If I ran my legs as much as I did my mouth, I`d be in fantastic shape.
My neighbors don`t appreciate it when I skip along the property line, singing "This Land is My Land."
If the TV show "Cops" has taught me anything, it`s to stay away from people with blurry faces....... they always seem to attract trouble.......
Why do they write PIZZA all over the box? What else could possibly be in there???
Sometimes there just aren’t enough curse words.
"The more the merrier": My excuse for extra food.
You never know how dirty a song’s lyrics are…until you hear a child sing them.
It`s such a beautiful day I had to open the window while I watched TV
just want to point out that Cinderella is living proof that shoes can change your life!
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.
The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!