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I like the part of the day when food happens.
It`s Friday! High-five some sh!t!
According to Facebook, some people I don`t remember are grilling this weekend.
Music is best when it’s louder than I can think.
Sorry, I`m in a hurry, lets talk while we walk... You go that way.
The perfect time for a snack is while you’re waiting for another snack to finish cooking.
My neighbours diary say`s I have boundary issues.
I hate it when people rub things in my face... unless it`s two boobs.
( )( ) =( `-` )= <( . )> ("`)("`) bunny!!
I wish banks would do a better job of keeping their ATMs filled. This is the fourth one I`ve been to that is saying "Insufficient Funds."
Pro Tip: If you`re on the bus, and wearing headphones, people can still hear you fart.
Crossfit is the healthiest way to get rid of your friends.
I`m not real excited that the wrapping on my toilet paper said `100% Recycled`.
1) Second. 2) Minute. 3) Hour. 4) Day. 5) Week. 6) Month. 7) Year. 8) Decade. 9) Century. 10) Millennium. 11) Women buying clothes.
I feel like a nickle in the March of Dimes.