Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Why is it socially acceptable to wear a bikini at the beach but not on the bus? At the end of the day I’m just a guy in a bikini on the bus.
Congratulations! I`ve finally snapped, and you`re first on my list!
I`m just standing here...50 yards away, waiting for the restraining order to expire.
Dear life, I`ve had enough bullsh!t to last a while. Can we take a little break please.
whoever said that there are no stupid questions was stupid
I got a little package in the mail today. For some reason it just reminded me of my ex.
With so many things coming back in style, I can`t wait until morals and intelligence become a trend again.
I`ve come to the point where I don`t even procrastinate anymore ... I just don`t do it.
People that use big words, but not in the right context, are just trying to be ambidextrous
Just because you`re not paranoid doesn`t mean they`re not out to get you.
I got a new high score today ... Sadly, it was on my bathroom scale
If we’re not supposed to eat late, then why is there a light in the fridge?
Facebook where I am surrounded with people but still no one can see me biting my toe nails or picking my nose :-D
I wonder if Monday can see my middle finger from here?
FYI: I`m never gonna tell the person I`m meeting up with that you said hi.