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I don`t play sports, the only sport I play is shopping. But there`s a lot of walking involved in that. Running sometimes if there`s a sale.
You know it`s good advice, when your still confused afterwards.
My brain is giving me the silent treatment today.
I was offering free mammograms in the company parking lot long before my employer was doing it ... just sayin
The hardest thing about returning to work after a long weekend is remembering to fart quietly.
It only takes one slow walking person in the grocery store to destoroy the illusion that I am a nice person.
I could do so much more if I only had minions.
I don`t really want to hear about the marathon, unless of course, they add an element of suspense ... Like a Bear at mile 3
OMG! I just discovered that if I align them JUST right, that I can make your boobs stand straight up (just like the broom trick)! Message me for an appointment! ;)
I solve all my problems by creating three new ones as distractions.
Did you know that DNA actually stands for "National Dislectic Association"
I`m not a doctor, but I play one on eHarmony.
I don`t know why the Petco cashier gave me this look when I asked for the fish`s Birth date.
So Stevie Wonder is going to become father to triplets next year. I guess he didn`t see that coming...
Yea, there is no "I" in team... but there sure is "ME".