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I have no time for games in my relationships. Unless by games you`re referring to naked twister. I`ve always got time for that sh!t.
One trenta cheeseburger please.
I bet more people would call the Gambling Addicts Helpline if they made every 5th caller a winner.
Wanna come over tonight for pizza and sex? lol jk, there`s no pizza
Not all guys just want s@x... I want sandwiches too.
Sometimes you have got to talk to a 3year old toddler in order to understand the meaning of happiness in life.
Lets not get carried away it`s not like McDonalds shutdown
Some people should be ticketed for wearing spandex
I wonder how many messengers were killed before they came up with the saying.
Yes, it`s a bad time. Let me call you back when I`m not feeling so honest.
Okay I`m going to workout. Should I post about it now or after I`m done?
You know you had an awesome night when you need sunglasses to get food out the fridge.
Being in hot water isn`t so bad if you throw in some bubbles and a glass of champagne.
I only have one word for women who look at me like Iām some kind of sex object ... Hi.
To any ex-military that live on my street I apologize for whatever messages we may be sending, 2yo has discovered light switches