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I hit a new low today and used a cheat code on Wii Fit
Sex with human, ok. Sex with cow, not ok. Grabbing cow titty, ok. Grabbing Karen in accounting`s titty, not ok. Apparently.
How to make a Vodka Christmas cake. . (Made mine this morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1......bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit. Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be... sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it is best to
Better ingredients. Better pizza. Horrible acting. Papa Johns.
Right now, a future teen mom is applying copious amounts of body glitter to herself.
Don`t blame the holidays, you were fat in August.
I hate when my mom tells people I`m 503 months old.
How do I tell a man he loves me?
Actually, I prefer to smile on the `inside`, then no one knows what you`re up to....
I heard she was born naked!! That slut!
Interviewer: "What did you like best about your last job?" Me: "Sometimes, people had birthdays and there was free cake."
At a wedding reception I recently attended someone said, "All the married men please stand next to the person who has made your life worth living." The bartender was nearly crushed to death.
Lazy Rule #23 :No Shower Is Needed, If your Not Going Anywhere...
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
You know that button in the elevator with the fireman´s hat on it... turns out that is not the button you press to get a fireman´s hat.