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Money is the root of all evil. For more information, send $10 to me.
word of the day: nincomtard
i am not so think, as you drunk i am
Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and a crappy party host.
Keep calm and drink on.
I hate the snow so much, I want to build a snowman just so I can punch it in its face.
You know what`s more miraculous than a video with a million view but no dislikes on YouTube? The detention sheet empty for my class.
In lieu of a gift I liked a couple of charities on FB in your honour
Grabbing a drink after work is perfectly fine.However, you look like an alcoholic when your getting that drink at 6am.
One out of every 4 Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they´re okay, then it´s you.
At work, sometimes I secretly brew decaf coffee in the normal pot so that everyone else works at my pace.
Time to get out of bed and worry from another location.
Given how enormous the universe is, I assume there’s an alien out there who does a mocking impression of me. Screw you, alien.
I laugh in the face of normal.
You know how sometimes as you fall asleep your whole body jolts you awake? That`s a ghost finishing sex with you.