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is 100% sure that you are looking at my status. (:
My day so far: 1) Jumped out of bed 2) Cooked breakfast 3) Ran 6 miles 4) Worked out 5) Started lying compulsively
Once I`m finished with this last container of Cool Whip, I will be the proud owner of a complete set of salad bowls.
When I say "It’s a long story" It usually means I just don’t want to tell you it.
Do you ever go on youtube just to watch a music video then 5 hours later you find yourself watching a tutorial on how to talk to a giraffe?
If by O.P.P. you mean Other People’s Pancakes, then yes I’m down with O.P.P.
My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Wal-mart.
If I can`t convince you, I will sure as hell confuse you.
I try not to work that much. That way I make less mistakes.
Men also have feelings. For example, we can feel hungry
I`m so fresh they call me "ferbreeze"
has a Massive drinking problem ... there is no alcohol in the house!
Having the worst day ever. All traffic lights I passed were green so I had to stop on the side of the road to check my Facebook like some caveman.
going to mcdonalds for a salad is like going to a brothel for a hug
When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog like I`m a blackjack dealer...