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Beer and a 44 magnum with an everclear shot makes everything good like Nintendo
Is it wrong to put leftover Halloween candy in their Easter baskets?
I’ve thought long and hard, and have decided on my New Year’s resolution ... 1024×768.
Age has its advantages. Too bad I can`t remember what they are.
There`s no life problem that a good "F*ck this shit" can`t solve.
Do you ever order a club sandwich just to feel like you`re a part of something?
Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"
So many people are making history right now. but me, I`m deleting history from my browser.
I see you posted a photograph of snow with the caption "it`s cold" could you tell me more about that
I super glue one jar of pickles shut and leave it out at the barbecue then watch the humiliation unfold.
Immature is just a word boring people use to describe fun people.
Pro tip: “Hold my drink” is not a proper response to “License and registration, please.” … apparently.
I`ve given up on giving up.
My penis was in the Guinness book of World Records. Then the librarian told me I had to take it out before she called security.
I paid My 11 year old $10 to do the dishes, then on her way to the bathroom I mugged her...because, you know, life lesson.